The Media.
After 24 hours on Tinder, some observations reveal themselves: 1. People like their jumping captured on camera. 2. Tigers are a lot more docile than PBS would lead you to believe. 3. The SS... Read more
If there’s one thing that the Gulf knows America for, it’s people-pleasing, so Iranian schoolchildren were elated as representatives from their favorite board game-slash-movie fr... Read more
The Laguna Beach SIK brothers [Sigma Iota Kappa fraternity members ]were totes stoked [quite excited] for their skydiving sesh [appointment], but were bummed [disappointed] when a bromo [ass... Read more
Thrace, Greece Historical Greek figure Aesop has been known to his fans for his prolific output of animal fan fiction. In light of recent public disbelief of absolutely everything, Aesop... Read more
Wasilla, Alaska Radio DJ James VanDreever — known to the airwaves as “Gouda Cheddar” — has been receiving thousands of tersely worded, G-rated letters from Wasillans... Read more
Dear 24 hour news cycle, Who died and made you precedent? It’s time to suffer for your work and make it difficult to deliver your mass-produced “information”. News should o... Read more
This newsflash brought to you by the advertising group responsible for the “Black Women Do Breastfeed” campaign. The agency’s claim to fame was realizing that events need t... Read more
According to a completely imagined Wikipedia post, Top 40 songs are scientifically engineered to have an neurologically adhesive quality. In the Inland Empire of Los Angeles rests a Gulag-es... Read more
Warrant Issued to Comment Section for E-Bullying
Cited for being the starting point for all internet homophobia, a warrant for the arrest of the “Siegfried and Roy Do Las Vegas” comment section was issued Monday morning. The co... Read more